There are two ways to complete the scene we started yesterday. The first is to end on a cliffhanger: the protagonist is still in trouble. The issues remain unresolved, and it looks like things are about to get worse instead of better. This is only a temporary ending, a pause to allow for simmering tension and other subplots.
Bur eventually, even the best action must reach a final conclusion. Either a character on the page is somehow thwarted, or the reader’s interest will be.
A true conclusion should result from information that’s always been there, or at least information that can be expected. If Lizzie suddenly sprouts wings and spits fire to seize the day, readers won’t believe in the ending. Better would be something along the lines of this:
"What are you gonna do, little girl?” asked chubby. He held the spider in her face….
Lizzie did her best not to faint. “I’m gonna get the sheriff,” she said.
“And what’s he gonna do? Laugh?”
Lizzie felt hot tears come to her eyes. She didn’t like these boys at all. But Sheriff Dave was one of the good guys. He brought cupcakes for everyone on the first day of school. And Lizzie had brought him that bottle of cough syrup the day he was too sick and the pharmacist too busy. Yes, Sheriff Dave would set things right. “What are you gonna do, little girl?” asked chubby. He held the spider in her face….
Lizzie did her best not to faint.
“I’m gonna get the sheriff,” she said.
“And what’s he gonna do? Laugh?”
Lizzie felt hot tears come to her eyes. She didn’t like these boys at all. But Sheriff Dave was one of the good guys. He brought cupcakes for everyone on the first day of school. And Lizzie had brought him that bottle of cough syrup the day he was too sick and the pharmacist too busy. Yes, Sheriff Dave would set things right.
“He’s gonna throw you losers in jail,” she said.
Does this complete the story? No – but it sets it up.
Once you’ve mastered these structural techniques, you’ll find it easier to incorporate other fundamental components of fiction into your action scenes. Action may drive the scene and hold the reader’s attention, but dialogue and setting are essential for setting the tone. And action itself should contribute to plot and characterization – if it doesn’t, readers will wonder why it’s there.
As you write your stories, remember that anyone can write about microscopic flesh-eating nanomachines. Incorporating fists and spiders and a gun or two is no problem. But readers don’t want a book about machines. They want a novel about the girl who saves the world with her pooper-scooper.
Keep your action focused on your protagonist and her struggle with life, and the story will ring true.
Ryan Edel is a former student of Bill Henderson. In workshops,
he’s best known for his insatiable lust for action. He has served in
the U.S. Army as a paratrooper in 82nd Airborne, and he will begin
MFA studies at Johns Hopkins this fall. He hopes that moving to
Baltimore will provide more opportunities for hand-to-hand
and street-to-street combat than Afghanistan did. Check out Ryan’s world at http://www.12WritingWorkshopsOnline
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